CAPITOL STUFF

• Document Type: CREST
• Collection: General CIA Records
• Document Number (FOIA) /ESDN (CREST): CIA-RDP78-03721A000300010088-0
• Release Decision: RIFPUB
• Original Classification: K
• Document Page Count: 1
• Document Creation Date: December 12, 2016
• Document Release Date: February 21, 2002
• Sequence Number: 88
• Publication Date: July 28, 1963
• Content Type: NSPR

Approved For Release 2002/03/20 : CIA-RDP78-03721A000300010088-0
By MICHAEL O'NEILL
Washington, July 27 - What with test bans, civil
rights and other odds and ends, we are loath to add still
another crisis to the nation's anxiety neurosis. But, it
should be known, there is an alarming worldwide shortage
of spies.
. Although it's top secret, of course, the peek-a-boo organizations,
of most big. countries are in.. a shambles. They've been decimated,,
picked.nearly as clean as a turkey bone, by the mass exposure of
their most talented agents.
As a result, there is such a
scramble for new recruits that
some spyinasters are shamelessly
raiding the secret cells of other
spymasters. It has got Co bad
that there are now triple and
quadruple .agents. Even James
Bond isn't quite sure who is spy-
ing for whom.
And every outfit is frantic-
ally offering more and more
fringe benefits in a will effort
to keep their spies contented with
their gay lot-bigger liquor al-
lowances, old-age pensions, anti-
execution insurance and dreamy
assignments like that Christine
Keeler affair.
In fact, if we may be permit-
ted a tiny security leak, this is the
real reason why CIA Director
John A. McCone and his fellow
spies have been padding up to
Capitol Hill the last few days for
secret huddles with secret sub-
committee No. I of the House
Armed Services Committee.
Their cover story was that
they were on a routine mission to
sell Congress on setting up a Central Intelligence Agency retirement
system to give their overworked spies in Russia the same benefits'
as any underworked American diplomat. Their real pitch, however,.
was that they desperately needed more fringe benefits to keep their
agents from being lured away by fat offers from such big-spending
rivals as Britain's M15 or Russia's KGB.
"I believe it is essential." McCone testified, "that the superb
quality of men and women in CIA be maintained and indeed be
improved, and moreover that the dedication of these employes be
recognized by the provision of active benefits."
Amen. There is no time to lose. In fact, we have it from a
completely reliable quadruple agent that there is already as active
international black of the ly O
s /20
Af!
young women of the o are comuma an ~c prices,
1 :, P a> mauaddMv; dioreetam at a
reasons for the manpower crisis during an interview in an abandoned
Minuteman silo. (Passamaquoddy is an alias because spy recruiters
-
are expected to observe the same maximum security precautions as
their clients.)
"Well, sir," Shoddy 'began, "it's all pretty simple. Spying has
got to be an aarfully big business. In fact, if the truth were known;
alone have got more than 300,000 agents in the 'field. And the
Western allies aren't slouches, either."
Another factor which Shoddy cited, as he tapped out a coded
message to Macao, is the impact of automation. Or rather the lack
of it. While lesser men have fallen before the computers, the spy
has never yielded. The wiles of a Christine or an Ivanov or the
artistry of a master blackmailer are as indispensable as ever.
"Of course, there is also the matter of these recent security break-
downs," said Shoddy with a faint smile. "As you know, there has
been a regular epidemic of disclosures. There have had to be some
wholesale replacements in Russia, Sweden, Germany and several
other countries. Russia has been picking up CIA spies and the FBI
has been picking up KGB agents."
. Tough an Britain and Sweden
All of this is very untidy, because Russia has to haul its spies
home and round up some replacements, and the CIA has to do the
same. Poor old Britain and Sweden are having to import an entirely
Another byproduct of the mass disruption of major spy net-
works is that a lot of top agents, with many good years still ahead
of them, are suddenly being removed from plush bigtime jobs. If
they don't have a good retirement program, they are having to settle.
spiring young underdeveloped nations.
Their departure, of course, triggers a critical shortage of undis-
Longer Life Expectancy for Spies Now
Thus, there is now a kind of gentleman's agreement that a
Efforts are also being made to emphasize the respectability of
the spy profession without downgrading the glamor (the Keeler-
Ivanov affair has been a real boon). And, as McCone testified, there
is a heavy new emphasis on pensions and other security guarantees.
A spy without a pension is a real security tiik.
CIA-RDP- 03721 A000300010088-0
of course, but even the seediest gumshoe can waste his own ticket
if he tlaalrt'"t beet Wight toe oSEem.